Saturday, September 25, 2010

A Lawful Thief

Theft, thievery, thieves. I strive, am decent, and I would amputate their hands the moment they emerged from my periphery if only they weren't so deceivingly charming; a small testament to their artful ruse.

To be a thief is to be a clandestine mole amongst the common populace; employed to no one, loyal to no one, answerable to no one. If we really think about the demands of their occupation, they are probably the most determined and hard working laborers in the world. They work alone; meaning they plan, decide, and act on their own pretexts. They have the capability to woo the stiff lipped law; as well as your indulgent attention. At any moment they are prepared to launch from idleness to action and are steadfast and exceedingly experienced enough to execute without delay. And unless their faces are exposed in the act we never know their identity. They could be anyone living anywhere doing any other thing during the span of time that they aren’t actively employed. Their salary could be anything from a second piece of cinnamon mint candy from the counter of the dentist to the Darya-ye Noor Diamond in the underground cellars of the non existent nuclear reactors of Iran; all they need is their own motivation to get it done. These people are spectacular.

No.

They are the rats of society that carve through our cupboards with their claws and fangs and drain your storage of cereal from the least conspicuous region of the box so that when time comes to shake the grain into your ceramic bowl you are perplexed that the golden flakes have miraculously vanished or that you had grabbed the box of sumptuous flecks of rat feces instead. “Curious, I don’t remember purchasing this…”

Well the rat does. And it came at the cost of your hunger. How does he afford to be so liberal with his spending and how exactly do you expect to make up for this loan? His luxury is exhausting your own resources that support your own opulence; this is clear to both of you. But if that’s the case, then you must have an eating disorder.

Is this fair to you who has had years of education and years of labor behind you that were the source of that bowl of cereal that would have been presently satisfying if it had only been there to satisfy, or can you accept this as the strenuous labors of another man? Isn’t it that that he has worked just as hard and risked thrice as much in order to make his living? How can a person reject his tryst with life when in fact his occupation requires tenfold the amount of courage of the common worker and twenty times the awareness? His work expresses his ingenuity and his worth to society. Is this thief the criminal or the victim? Where and what in his life had gone awry to send this soldier of genius to the front lines of the social battle of class and uphold the position of a saboteur to either’s side?

What if he was polite and regurgitated the cereal midway during digestion? Is that still theft? The Theft Act states that a person shall be guilty of theft if he dishonestly appropriates property belonging to another with the intention of permanently depriving the other of it.
So what if it was temporary and he desperately needed the cereal during the time of the theft and maybe you hadn’t any immediate need of at that moment. Can we then not forgive and forget with the hope of return? Maybe this is the condition of a thief. You have, and they do not, and for a multiplicity of reasons they needed it now so they stole it. Because you have, they do not. You take from, they take away. You are as much a thief as the man who is lawfully guilty of it. Absurd statement it is not. We’ve all heard the accusations of America being the selfish friend of the world. Well let’s be ‘dillogical’; we take from all and give back only to some. We may not be considered thieves to all, but to some we are nothing more or less than one. We deliberately deprive others without the intent of returning what we take simply because we need it at the present moment and they do not. What happens when the time comes that a dependency is developed on that which has been taken? Do we have the intention to give back? Do we even have the reserve to replace what is there no longer? Let me debrief you: Most of this is nonsensical rant as I’m sure you can discern. But the questions are relevant to the nature of your life and how you live it. Ask yourself and see what answers you get. Do they have any value to you? Are you in a position to accept or reject the value as consequential or of any significance?

Does anyone ever get bloated?

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